The Myth Called Work-Life Balance

In the words of Mr. Miyagi: Better learn balance. Balance is key

As moms, we think about work life, home life, family, marriage, friendships... need I say more?

No such thing as work-life balance, every family is different- Gary Vee

When we are strong in your family or work and then the other part is weak, you're not balanced

Myth is defined in Merriam Webster's dictionary as a traditional story of ostensibly historical events that serves to unfold part of the world view of a people or explain a practice, belief, or natural phenomenon. I googled work-life balance and I stuck with this compilation of work-life balance quotes I found on realwealth.com by Jessica Willens.

Here are some quotes that I'd share with you:

1. Either you run the day, or the day runs you- Jim Rohn

2. Balance is not better time management, but better boundary management. Balance means making choices and enjoying those Choices- Betsy Jacobson

3. Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life - Dolly Parton

4. When in doubt, choose the kids. There will be plenty of time later to choose work - Anna Quindlen

5. Time is really the only capital that any human being has, and the only thing he can't afford to lose - Thomas Edison

6. Don't forget to breathe- Mr. Miyagi.

7. Boundaries help create mutual balance instead of split balance - the book Boundaries by Dr's. Henry Cloud and John Townshend.

Proverbs 31.org has an article about boundaries

We can choose to wait and see how things fall in place because we do not want to envy others or keep up with the Jones’ but see Ecclesiastes 4:5-6 read it here

We can say we don’t want to work too hard because we are trying to achieve balance but see Proverbs 6:10:

A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest….

Luke 10: 38-42:

The story is about two sisters, Mary and Martha

When Jesus came to visit them: Mary sat down to listen to Jesus but Martha got busy serving Jesus and the guests. Martha asked Jesus to tell Mary to help her but Jesus reminded her Mary chose the right thing and it would not be taken from her.

So we choose; we redefine our boundaries and that with prayers we can achieve or accomplish this myth called work-life balance!

Three Ways to Balance the Chaos

In the last episode I had talked about the 5 steps I used and use as I potty train.

-I made up more “used the potty” songs than I had ever thought I would- I should try to record them sometime. These songs were the rewards for my son using the potty. I think these crazy songs were more fun for him than giving him any rewards and I am going to stick to this process.

-I also observed that I am a bit on the not so patient side of the spectrum of things. I was a bit grumpy when I was asked to stop what I was doing- like homework- to help little man go to the bathroom. I prayed and then thought of the big picture like savings on not having to purchase any more diapers or pull ups; this changed my mood. I can use the extra cash to knock of bills.

-Practice made perfect. The more, my spouse and I encouraged our son to go potty, the more confident he was and the easier it was for him to go.

Today, I would talk about balancing all that I have going on daily.

First I want to say that it is not easy but for now, I have a simple routine that helps me balance the chaos of homework, parenting and working. I have a weakness for and or I would say I get distracted by social media quite easily and I notice that I spend more time online than doing homework.

1. I pray. I am a person of faith and I have often times asked God for help and He has helped me. I pray for the ability to focus on the task at hand and help to finish it on time. James 1:5 encourages us to ask for wisdom, I add grace too when I am asking.

2. Plan. I make a list of what needs to get done. I use an app called Todoist. I use the free version for now and I love what I have been able to do since installing it. I make a list of what I need to get done with the date and when the day comes, it notifies me of it on my phone and my email. When the task is done, I delete it by check it off. With regards to homework, I know when the deadlines are and I make sure to get the work done or I lose points.

3. Prepare ahead. For me, I am trying to get into making a menu with meals that my whole family can eat and enjoy. For this reason, we go grocery shopping on the weekend and if I have a deadline to meet with school work, my husband helps. We cook some and freeze some of the meals for the week. Regarding outfits for work, I wear scrubs and this for me is a huge time saver. I do not spend time trying to match shoes or outfits, I get my scrubs cleaned and ready to go. If you have to dress professionally for work, set out clothes to wear for the week. This will make a huge difference for you.

Balancing is not a thing that can be achieved in a day, week or month. When I was in Nigeria and we went to fetch water from the streams and the bore hole for water, it took lots of practice to be able to balance a basin of water on your head. It was hard work to do that and at the beginning, lots of water was spilled when it was carried from the stream to the house. By the end of the year after consistently fetching water, we had more water in the basin than what was spilled out.

Give your self time. You’ve got this.

How do you balance your chaos? Listen here

Have a great week!